Who Am I…

At the age of 19, I took a bold and life-changing step by leaving school to join the Marine. This decision marked the beginning of a passionate journey fuelled by determination and dreams. I dedicated myself wholeheartedly, joining the Merchant Marine and striving every day to reach the pinnacle of success as a Marine Officer. My commitment was unwavering, and my ambition clear to serve with honour and achieve the highest rank possible.

Yet, despite my hard work and dedication, the path was not without harsh challenges. Social discrimination created barriers that were difficult to overcome, testing my resolve at every turn. Coupled with this, my health began to decline rapidly, adding another layer of struggle that slowly chipped away at my aspirations. Watching my most cherished dream unravel was a painful experience, yet it has not diminished the pride I hold in my journey or the strength gained along the way.

This story is not just about hardship but about the resilience and passion that define my pursuit. It is an invitation to acknowledge the complexities of life’s challenges and to celebrate the courage it takes to dream, strive, and persevere; even when the outcome is uncertain. At AMAR SHOPNO, I share this honest reflection as a testament to the ongoing journey of creativity, passion, and hope toward a meaningful future.

I never truly understood where or how to begin my journey into creativity and passion. From 1988 to 2005, I was blessed with the extraordinary chance to travel across the world on various deployments, encountering cultures, landscapes, and moments that most can only dream of. Yet, instead of capturing these priceless experiences through photography or video, I found myself swept away, dancing through the nights, fully living in each fleeting second. Looking back, I realise those moments held an irreplaceable magic memories that could have been preserved forever to share with my loved ones. Now, in my 50s, I stand at a crossroads, still searching for that clear path and my true calling. Photography, which first sparked my curiosity at age 14 thanks to my mom’s inspiring passion, has slowly become my compass. It wasn’t until 2014, with my very first DSLR and the challenge of shooting in Manual Mode, that I truly felt the thrill of creation ignite within me. Taking that leap to build my own website was equally daunting but discovering Squarespace transformed that fear into excitement. This journey of learning and growth is just beginning, and I warmly invite you to join me as I navigate this vibrant, unfolding adventure with openness and heart. There’s so much ahead, and I can’t wait to share every step of it with you.

I began with a simple yet heartfelt mission: to openly share my unique journey, a vibrant and colourful world filled with diverse hobbies, innovative creative ideas, and exciting, thrilling projects right here on this website and my YouTube channel. While having access to contests, sponsorships, or external platforms might have made the path a bit smoother and added some extra flair or polish, the true and unwavering driving force behind all my work was my sincere passion and strong determination. Even without those opportunities readily available or guaranteed, I chose to take a courageous leap of faith, embracing the challenges and uncertainties wholeheartedly to honestly connect with you all through my personal stories, honest reflections, and real experiences. This is not just about sharing content or posting updates; it's about inviting you to join me in a genuine and heartfelt adventure that is fuelled by creativity, authenticity, and a deep love for everything I do.

Please feel absolutely welcome to take your time leisurely wandering through the many different sections of the site at your own comfortable and unhurried pace, allowing yourself the freedom to explore without any rush or pressure. I genuinely hope and truly wish that as you explore, you discover something here that sparks your genuine interest or inspires your creativity in some special, meaningful, and heartfelt way. Whenever you feel like it, I would be absolutely thrilled and delighted to hear from you; whether it’s your personal thoughts, creative ideas, or any kind of feedback you’d like to generously share with me. You can easily reach out to me on the Contact Me page or leave a thoughtful comment on any of my YouTube Videos. Your valuable insights and honest opinions truly mean the world to me, and I deeply appreciate every little bit of your ongoing support. Thank you so much for being here with me and sharing this beautiful and meaningful journey together! Your presence truly means the world to me, and I deeply appreciate your support and companionship along the way.

If you’re curious to know more about who I am, my personal story, journey, and the dreams I’m passionately working towards, you’ll find a detailed section below where I open up wholeheartedly about my aspirations and what deeply drives me every single day. I sincerely hope this helps you connect more closely with the heart behind Amar Shopno and gain a richer, more intimate understanding of what this beautiful, inspiring journey is all about.

Embrace the Dream

Hello,

Firstly, I want to warmly and sincerely welcome you to my website! This special place is not just any ordinary corner of the internet, it is where dreams transcend mere wishes and become living, breathing ideas that are ready to grow, evolve, and truly flourish. Here, you’ll discover a vibrant world filled to the brim with endless opportunities, boundless creativity, and uplifting inspiration; a unique space where your deepest passions can ignite fresh beginnings and illuminate the path toward a meaningful, fulfilling, and richly rewarding future.

I warmly invite you to embrace this beautiful journey with an open and trusting heart, allowing your true, authentic self to shine radiantly through every step you take along the way. Your unique perspective, your personal story, and your individual voice are incredibly precious—they hold the incredible power to connect deeply with others, offering comfort, encouragement, and a shared sense of understanding. Always remember, it’s your authenticity—your genuine voice, your heartfelt experiences—that makes you truly stand out in this vast, ever-connected world we live in today. So, please take your time here, feel free to share your thoughts openly and honestly, and know with confidence that every single word you contribute enriches and strengthens this welcoming community.

As time passes, we come to see that change is one of the few true constants in life. The seasons of life shift endlessly, people come and go, and the world around us is always evolving in ways both small and profound. I have walked through many of these changes myself, experiencing periods of growth, transformation, and deep self-discovery in numerous areas of my life. Along this journey, I have also faced the profound sadness of losing cherished individuals—those irreplaceable souls who helped shape my earliest years and who continue to hold a permanent and special place in my heart. Though their physical presence is no longer with me, their loving memories and the timeless lessons they imparted continue to guide and inspire me each day

Now, as I find myself well into my mid-50s, I often take quiet moments to pause and reflect deeply on the winding, intricate, and sometimes unexpected path my life has taken, especially since settling in the beautiful, vibrant, and welcoming United Kingdom back in 1993. My journey actually began several years earlier, way back in 1988, when I first stepped confidently into the vast, demanding, and challenging world of the Merchant Marine as a young, enthusiastic apprentice—full of hopes, dreams, and a wealth of untapped potential waiting to be discovered. Through relentless determination, unwavering resilience, and an unyielding commitment to hard work and continuous learning, I steadily climbed the ranks, ultimately earning the proud and hard-earned title of Chief Officer by 1994. My move to the UK was fueled by a heartfelt, long-held dream—to one day captain a ship—a dream that I realized with great dedication, perseverance, and immense pride after passing my rigorous exams in 1994, which firmly established my role as a Chief Officer and set me on the path toward achieving my ultimate goal.

Despite my high ambitions and readiness to embrace new and exciting challenges, the years that followed proved to be far more difficult than I had ever anticipated. I eagerly looked forward to returning to the sea, the place that felt most like home to me, a sanctuary where my spirit found peace and purpose. However, I found myself trapped in a frustrating and extended two-year wait, stretching from 1994 to 1996, during which I tirelessly searched for meaningful opportunities that consistently seemed to slip just beyond my grasp. Then, in 2005, life threw an unexpected and deeply difficult challenge in my path. After many years of unwavering dedication and hard work, nearly 200 of us, myself included, were laid off from the company that I had poured my heart, soul, and countless hours into, leaving me standing at a challenging and uncertain crossroads. Undeterred by this setback, I made countless efforts to regain my place at sea, fueled by determination and an unshakable love for the ocean. With the steadfast support and encouragement of one of the most respected Captains I had the great honor to work alongside, I faced these hardships with honesty, hope, and a renewed sense of purpose. Yet, despite all these persistent efforts and my unwavering passion, external forces beyond my control stood firmly in the way, preventing me from returning to the life I cherished so deeply and truly called my own. Through all these trials, hardships, and moments of doubt, my commitment never faltered, and my passion for the endless, open sea continues to remain a guiding beacon, shining brightly and steadfastly in my heart.

Unable to afford simply staying home and doing nothing, I made the courageous decision to start fresh by joining the IT team of a mobile phone repair company in Norwich, Norfolk, UK. This exciting new chapter in my life was filled with hope, determination, and a renewed sense of purpose, yet it was quickly overshadowed by the severe decline in my health. The root cause was a long-standing spinal injury that had haunted me since my days as a Marine Officer back in 1989. By 2008, my condition had worsened significantly, reaching a point where I had no choice but to step away entirely from work to focus solely on my health and recovery. This abrupt and overwhelming shift in my life's trajectory was something I never saw coming. It deeply affected my confidence and spirit, leaving me feeling lost, vulnerable, and disconnected from the simple pleasures and routines of daily life that I once took for granted. Coming to terms with the need to use a wheelchair by the middle of 2009 was one of the most difficult and life-altering realities I had to face. However, through every dark and challenging moment, the unwavering love, patience, and support of my two wonderful daughters and their devoted mother remained my rock and anchor. Without their kindness, strength, and constant encouragement, I honestly don’t know where I would have been emotionally or physically during those incredibly difficult times.

Photography has always been a powerful and deeply heartfelt passion for me—one that has been lovingly nurtured and cherished since my early childhood, all thanks to the unwavering encouragement and support of my loving mother back in 1982. This strong and intimate connection to photography has profoundly shaped the course of my life, offering a constant source of comfort, inspiration, and joy. In January 2013, the unforgettable day I finally held my very first DSLR camera marked a truly transformative milestone in my journey—a wonderful gateway to countless creative adventures and meaningful self-expression. From that pivotal moment onward, I have dedicated myself wholeheartedly to developing, honing, and refining my skills with unwavering commitment. Photography not only fills my heart with immense joy but also serves as a vital and energizing focus that keeps my mind sharp, active, and deeply engaged. It has evolved far beyond a simple hobby; it is now a passionate pursuit that breathes renewed purpose and profound meaning into my life, motivating me every day to capture those fleeting moments that brighten my world and, in turn, inspire the hearts of others.

Over time, I gradually felt a deep and sincere desire emerging within me to create my very own personal website—a unique and special space where I could openly and freely share my creative work, ideas, and heartfelt expressions with the world. This heartfelt aspiration truly came from a genuine and passionate place deep in my heart, as I longed to connect meaningfully with others through my art and creativity. However, the reality of building such a platform proved to be far more demanding, challenging, and complex than I had initially imagined or anticipated. I found myself caught in a tangled maze of uncertainty and hesitation, repeatedly questioning the best path, approach, and direction to pursue in order for my vision to come alive and flourish. It wasn’t until the year 2014 that a wonderful and inspiring opportunity came my way, reigniting my passion and giving me a renewed sense of purpose and motivation, encouraging me to move forward with fresh confidence and unwavering determination.

My original vision was simple yet profoundly meaningful: to publish and lovingly showcase the diverse and carefully curated collection of photographs I had captured over many special and unforgettable years. These treasured images hold countless stories, deep emotions, and precious memories woven into each frame, and I genuinely wished to share them not only with my family and close friends but also with anyone out there who could truly appreciate the beauty, artistry, and special moments elegantly frozen in time. Since then, the unwavering support, heartfelt encouragement, and kindness from a few incredible and genuinely generous people in my life have made all the difference. Their genuine belief in me and my work has helped everything shift in remarkably unexpected and wonderful ways, opening new doors and endless possibilities for my creative journey ahead, filling me with renewed hope and inspiration every day.

That said, my journey has not been without its fair share of obstacles and hurdles, each presenting its own set of trials and lessons. I have faced many difficulties and challenges along the way, and I fully understand that everyone encounters their own unique struggles, often shaped by different life experiences, backgrounds, and personal circumstances. Living with disabilities and the limitations they bring has added extra layers of complexity, depth, and difficulty to my pursuit, but I choose to recognize these barriers with honesty, courage, and resilience. I remain committed to continually striving to overcome them step by step, no matter how tough or demanding the path may be, always embracing growth and perseverance as my guiding principles.

My adventure into the captivating and enchanting world of photography began many, many years ago, long before digital cameras became mainstream, with my Mum’s cherished and beloved film camera, back in the early 1980s. If memory serves me right, it was the ‘Yashica FX-7’ or a very similar model—truly a treasured and reliable tool that first ignited my lifelong fascination with capturing life’s fleeting and precious moments in a tangible form. During those early days, I didn’t yet have the chance or resources to deeply nurture this budding passion or to carefully develop and refine my skills into what I would now consider to be decent and meaningful photography. At the time, I was also completely unaware of the essential and intricate interplay between ISO, Shutter Speed, and Aperture—the fundamental and dynamic triangle that helps breathe life and soul into photographs, turning mere snapshots into expressive stories. Looking back with fondness and gratitude, I see this as an important and invaluable part of my ongoing learning journey, and I continue to grow and evolve every day, inspired and driven by a heartfelt commitment to creativity, genuine self-expression, and the endless magic found through the lens.

After spending a considerable amount of time researching extensively and reaching out for guidance from many different experienced sources across various platforms, I was truly fortunate and grateful to come across Jared Polin. He is not just a remarkably talented photographer but also an exceptional individual whose passion, authenticity, and unwavering dedication genuinely inspire me on so many different levels. His exceptional work speaks volumes about his expertise, creativity, and commitment, and the valuable insights he generously shares have become a shining beacon of knowledge that I continue to rely on with deep trust and immense respect. Following his incredible journey and absorbing his thoughtful teachings through both his website and vibrant YouTube channel have been nothing short of transformative for me personally and creatively. These resources are far more than just educational, they have evolved into a powerful source of motivation, encouragement, and daily inspiration that continuously pushes me forward every single day.

To deepen my understanding even further and to build a stronger foundation, I decided to invest in two of his highly recommended and carefully crafted DVD Guides: the "Go Above and Beyond Auto" and the "Beginner Flash Guide." These comprehensive, well-structured guides have been absolutely instrumental in shaping my skills and significantly boosting my confidence behind the camera. Each lesson within these guides is clear, practical, and thoughtfully designed, effectively helping me navigate the often complex and challenging world of photography with greater ease, passion, and genuine enthusiasm. I am genuinely grateful for the profound and lasting impact these valuable tools have had on my creative journey, and I continue to apply what I’ve learned consistently to create work that I am truly proud of and excited to share. This enriching experience has taught me far more than just photography techniques; it has highlighted the immense value of persistence, honesty, patience, and the relentless pursuit of passion in every endeavour I undertake.

During this truly transformative and deeply meaningful period in my life, I was incredibly fortunate and eternally grateful to discover the amazing duo Tony & Chelsea Northrup, whose inspiring, thoughtful, and expertly crafted work opened up an entirely new, fascinating, and richly rewarding world of knowledge and creativity for me. Their insightful, detailed, and beautifully well-crafted books, including such phenomenal titles as "How to Create Stunning Photography," "Photography Buying Guide," and "Lightroom 6/CC," quickly became invaluable, trusted, and cherished resources that profoundly expanded my understanding and deeply enhanced my practical skills in ways I had never imagined possible. Honestly, their clear, patient, and compassionate guidance felt like having a wise, encouraging, and ever-supportive friend faithfully by my side, gently showing me the way and warmly encouraging me to explore, experiment, and push far beyond my original comfort zones. As I dove deeper and deeper into the intricate craft, my initial curiosity about photography blossomed into a powerful, heartfelt, and enduring passion that grew stronger, brighter, and more vibrant with each passing day, continually inspiring me to reach new creative heights and embrace the artistry of every moment.

This blossoming enthusiasm awakened something truly profound and transformative within me, a sincere, heartfelt, and genuine desire to do something meaningful, impactful, and truly extraordinary that could touch the lives of others in a positive way. Over time, I gradually began to realise that by openly sharing my own personal journey, experiences, and creative discoveries, I could inspire, motivate, and uplift others who were facing similar challenges, dreams, and deep aspirations, helping them feel less alone on their own paths. This beautiful revelation led me to make the heartfelt, exciting, and courageous decision to step fully into the vibrant, dynamic, and ever-evolving world of YouTube, a platform brimming with endless creative possibilities. Becoming a Vlogger felt like the perfect, natural path to connect with like-minded individuals, to share not only the technical techniques and practical tips I had carefully learned through experience but also the heartfelt stories, emotions, and unique creative spirit behind every single image I strive passionately to create with love and dedication. It has been an exciting, rewarding, and deeply fulfilling adventure so far, one filled with growth and meaningful connections, and I eagerly look forward to continuing this creative voyage with open arms, ready to grow, evolve, and learn alongside a wonderful, supportive, and inspiring community of photography lovers and passionate storytellers who share in this incredible journey together.

I was actively searching for fresh ideas and new inspiration when, quite unexpectedly, I came across the incredibly talented and inspiring Peter McKinnon. His amazing and breathtaking work immediately captivated my attention and sparked a small but powerful flicker of motivation deep within me. The creativity and passion he poured into every project resonated deeply with my own desires and dreams, reminding me of the endless possibilities that come with truly pursuing something you love wholeheartedly. It felt like a genuine wake-up call, a heartfelt nudge gently encouraging me to take that crucial first step toward something meaningful, rewarding, and fulfilling in my own life, something that could transform my perspective and open new doors I hadn’t even imagined before.

However, as often happens on journeys truly worth taking, I find myself feeling stuck and hesitant more than I ever expected, grappling with a complex mix of emotions that are both challenging and surprisingly intense. There’s this familiar yet somewhat unsettling feeling of uncertainty and creeping self-doubt that quietly takes hold every time I deeply consider fully committing myself to becoming a dedicated YouTuber and immersing myself wholeheartedly in the vibrant, dynamic, and constantly evolving world of Vlogging. It’s not because I lack desire, passion, or enthusiasm; rather, it’s the heavy weight of the unknown, the persistent shadow of fear of failure, and the daunting challenge of stepping far beyond my usual comfort zone, where everything feels safe, predictable, and controlled. Yet, despite all these complicated emotions and swirling concerns within me, I know deep down that pushing past this hesitation and discomfort is an essential and unavoidable part of the growth process. Embracing this moment honestly, courageously, and with an open heart is absolutely vital if I truly want to develop, learn, and wholeheartedly follow my passion with genuine dedication and resilience. This journey, filled with its many ups and downs, countless uncertainties, and unexpected breakthroughs, is precisely where true transformation begins and where my dreams gradually start to take shape and come alive in ways I had only imagined before.

This website has been carefully and lovingly brought to life with the incredible and ongoing support of Squarespace, whose platform offers such an intuitive, flexible, and reliable foundation for my creative journey and personal growth. Though learning to navigate all the various technical aspects has been a real and rewarding challenge, I approach it with honest determination, plenty of patience, and a heart full of hope, excitement, and curiosity. I firmly believe that with every new step I take, my confidence and abilities will steadily grow stronger, enabling me to skilfully master website design and dive even deeper into the captivating and ever-evolving realms of photography and cinematography. Above all, this special space was created not just to develop my technical skills but to warmly share my creative vision, my personal photographs, heartfelt stories, and artistic expressions, with the wonderful family, friends, and community members who constantly inspire, uplift, and motivate me. Their steadfast encouragement and kind support truly fuel my passion, giving me the strength and courage to keep pushing forward, evolving, and turning my dreams into beautiful reality, one inspiring moment at a time.

I genuinely and warmly invite you to share your valuable thoughts, suggestions, and comments anytime you wish in the “Contact Me” section. Your honest, heartfelt, and sincere feedback means the absolute world to me and plays an incredibly crucial role in helping me continuously enhance, refine, and improve this website in meaningful and impactful ways. Beyond that, your input not only supports my personal growth as a passionate photographer but also greatly assists me in crafting beautiful, meaningful, and deeply impactful cinematography that truly resonates with others. Moreover, it effectively guides me on the exciting and ever-evolving path toward becoming a successful, inspiring, and dedicated vlogger who can genuinely connect with people through authentic and relatable storytelling. I deeply appreciate your ongoing support, trust, and encouragement in my creative journey, it genuinely motivates and inspires me every single day to keep working hard, evolving, and striving for excellence in all that I do. Thank you sincerely and wholeheartedly from the very bottom of my heart for being such an important, cherished, and treasured part of this wonderful adventure we share together.

Although my disability presents several challenges that limit my movements in many ways, I remain genuinely hopeful and deeply excited about the incredible opportunity to travel across the beautiful UK and beyond. I am truly eager and enthusiastic to explore a wide variety of fascinating places in different countries over the coming months, embracing every unique experience with both an open heart and an open mind. This journey means so much to me, not only as a personal adventure and a chance for growth and self-discovery but also as a wonderful opportunity to connect with all of you through stories, visuals, and shared moments that inspire, uplift, and bring us closer together in meaningful and lasting ways.

My ultimate dream has always been to create meaningful and deeply engaging videography for my YouTube channel, beautifully capturing the true and authentic spirit of each destination we visit in a way that feels both personal and deeply inspiring. I want to share these precious, unforgettable moments with you in a manner that genuinely resonates with people from all walks of life, thoughtfully highlighting the unique beauty, rich culture, and fascinating stories that make every place truly special and memorable. From the bustling, vibrant streets filled with colourful life, energy, and the heartbeat of local communities to the serene, peaceful landscapes that inspire calm, reflection, and a sense of wonder, my goal is to bring each location vividly and thoughtfully to life for you. Along this journey, I hope to foster a deeper connection between us, encouraging curiosity and appreciation for the diverse cultures and breathtaking scenes that our world offers. Together, we can explore, celebrate, and appreciate the diverse wonders of the world, connecting through these experiences no matter where you are or what your individual journey might be.

Starting this incredible and deeply inspiring journey has filled me with a profound sense of joy, excitement, and meaningful purpose that touches my very soul in ways I could never have imagined. It truly feels like a wonderful privilege and a great honour to share with you the numerous captivating, beautiful, and heartfelt photos and videos I capture along the way, both here on my Website and through my YouTube Channel. Each treasured and meaningful moment is carefully documented, not just for my personal memories but so that you can fully experience the magic, wonder, and enchantment right alongside me at every step of this adventure. Together, we’ll embark on this amazing and unforgettable journey, learning, growing, and celebrating the extraordinary beauty of our diverse world in a heartfelt, sincere, and honest way, creating memories that will resonate deeply within us all, inspiring us to dream bigger and appreciate every precious moment.

Alongside my heartfelt and enduring passion for photography, I remain deeply and unwaveringly committed to supporting charitable organisations dedicated to disability awareness and assistance throughout the entire UK. Being actively involved with these incredible, inspiring, and compassionate communities since 2008 has been nothing short of an honour, a true privilege, and an enriching life experience that has profoundly shaped my outlook and significantly enriched my understanding of resilience, empathy, and compassion on many levels. It fills me with profound gratitude, humility, and a deep sense of responsibility to contribute, in whatever small way I can, towards meaningful and positive change that genuinely improves the lives of so many wonderful, courageous, and deserving individuals, whose strength and determination continually inspire and humble me every single day, fuelling my commitment even further. I warmly and sincerely invite you to explore my carefully captured photos, which reflect moments full of beauty, raw emotion, and genuine human connection, inviting you to feel the stories behind each frame.

Please do not hesitate to share your thoughts, reflections, or suggestions with me at any time, as your honest and thoughtful feedback means the world to me. Your insights play a truly vital role in helping me grow as an artist, refine my craft with each passing day, and make every creative project even more impactful, authentic, and heartfelt. From the very bottom of my heart, thank you endlessly for your ongoing support, encouragement, and kindness, together, we keep this inspiring journey alive, brimming with purpose and drive, fuelled by passionate creativity and shared dreams that continue to light the way forward for us all.

Dawid Hassan Abdullah... 

At Salford Royal Hospital on December 2017 in HDCU - after the ops on my Spine where it broke (Neck)

From Where I Came Back!!!

From Where I Came Back

Reflecting on my journey, I often find myself pondering the countless experiences that shaped who I am today. The places I've visited and the people I've met have all contributed to my growth and understanding of the world around me. Each memory, vivid and cherished, takes me back to moments that were not just pivotal, but transformative, guiding me back to where I truly belong. 

I must admit, expressing myself can sometimes be a bit challenging and even overwhelmingly difficult at times, but I'm genuinely willing to give it a real try, especially since you've shown such great interest in hearing my thoughts and unique perspective! Your constant encouragement truly makes me feel more inspired to open up and share my innermost feelings and ideas with you, which I truly value.

I have been diligently working as a Merchant Navy Officer, including my Apprenticeship, since the year 1988, starting out at the young and impressionable age of just 19. In 1989, I encountered a little incident that could have potentially set me back significantly in both my personal and professional life, but I chose to brush it aside and instead committed myself to a substantial amount of physiotherapy in order to get back on track and moving forward in my career. Little did I know, nor could I have ever predicted, that this injury would resurface nearly three decades later in my life, presenting new and unexpected challenges that would test my resilience. I faced intermittent problems with my spine from time to time, but with the help of effective medication and ongoing physiotherapy, I managed to cope until 2008, when I ultimately made the difficult decision to hang up my coat and officially retire just shy of my 40th birthday, marking the end of an era in my maritime career, seeking new pathways.

With a strong desire not to simply sit idly in my trusty wheelchair doing nothing, I made the conscious decision to dedicate my time and energy to working voluntarily with various charities that passionately support disabled individuals and advocate for their rights. Starting in 2008, my marriage journey faced numerous emotional challenges and ultimately came to an end; however, my former spouse and I mutually agreed to wait until our daughters reached high school before taking that significant and life-altering step. In 2015, that dreaded moment finally arrived, and we made the heartfelt decision to go our separate ways, all the while prioritising our children's well-being. In 2016 and 2017, to my complete surprise, I unexpectedly reconnected with a long-lost friend from years ago, and we began to rediscover the beautiful friendship we had forged after being apart since 1995. Eventually, after much contemplation and shared experiences, we made the joyful decision to tie the knot in May 2017, hoping to finally put an end to the turbulent chapters of our past and embrace a brighter future together.

My health was slowly deteriorating, and I was struggling to manage my daily life without adequate assistance. I voiced my concerns to my GP regarding the alarming loss of strength in my grips, and the persistent pain in my spine had intensified significantly over time. Living on my own and grappling with the fear of what might happen if my spine were to completely give out, my wife (who is now my partner) and I made the important decision to finalise our marriage as soon as possible. Due to my disabilities, the Home Office had previously advised me that we could not complete our online marriage, initiated earlier in May 2017,  without attending to the necessary formalities in person in Bangladesh to facilitate her VISA application. Our inability to marry online via video conferencing stemmed from my status as an unemployed and registered disabled individual, which could have led to the misconception of our union being one of convenience, according to the guidance from the Home Office in the UK. Consequently, I decided to fly to Bangladesh in November 2017, and we both agreed to hold our wedding upon my arrival at my sister’s home in Dhaka. However, just a fortnight before my scheduled departure, my GP insisted on seeing me urgently. When I attended that appointment a week before my flight, I was disheartened to learn that I needed to postpone my travel plans, as they wanted to conduct further tests. I had been persistently communicating my health issues to my GP and consultants since I was advised in 2009-10 by one of the Associate Professors at LabAid in Dhaka, who is now a Professor. Unfortunately, their only response was to operate on Carpal Tunnel, which I later learned, during consultations in 2017-18, was unnecessary, as my real problems were rooted in my spine and not my wrist.

My GP had advised me not to go anywhere until I heard back from them by the 6 November 2017. However, since I didn’t receive any communication whatsoever from either my GP or the Hospital, I made the decision to fly out on the 7 November 2017 to BD. Upon my arrival on the 8 November 2017, we joyfully got married as planned, celebrating a significant moment in our lives. About a week later, I made an appointment to see the same Orthopaedic Professor at LabAid, bringing along my MRI report from the UK. The very first thing he asked was what treatment I had received since his original diagnosis and advice. I explained to him in detail exactly what procedures had been done, and to my shock, he literally threw the MRI report across the table, expressing his frustration and disappointment towards the Health Professionals in the UK for disrespecting both his diagnosis and his advice. I took the time to explain the ongoing issues I was facing at that time, just as I had done with my GP back in England. After assessing my situation, he prescribed me the same medicines that he had given me back in 2009, although at stronger doses this time, along with some medications I was already taking in the UK. He expressed genuine concerns about my condition and advised me that if my health were to worsen, I should seek him out immediately. Just three days later, one evening, my wife and I were returning home after visiting some relatives via an Uber. Unfortunately, the driver failed to stop or slow down when noticing a pothole followed closely by a speed-bump. The result of this oversight was inevitable. When we finally got back and I attempted to exit the car, I quickly realised that I had lost strength on my right side and was finding it exceedingly difficult to take even a single step with my right leg. Later that night, and ever since that moment, I found myself struggling more than ever…

My wife, Moni, was incredibly supportive during this challenging and trying time, as she had to feed me and assist me with showering and attending to all my other daily needs, since I was unfortunately unable to do much of anything with my right arm. As the days went by, I was gradually deteriorating, feeling worse and weaker by the hour, and experiencing severe spasms that caused me to slip unexpectedly down the bed with alarming force. This concerning situation compelled us to make the difficult decision to return to LabAid hospital once again for further evaluation and treatment. As soon as we arrived and carefully got out of the car, we had to cross the bustling road to enter the hospital safely. I was using my crutches, and as I attempted to navigate the curve, I unfortunately lost complete control of my right side, causing me significant distress. Once we were in the hospital, the doctor strongly advised me to return to the UK immediately without any further delay. He emphasised that while he could perform surgery on my spine here in Bangladesh, I wouldn’t be able to receive the necessary aftercare that I would have access to back in the UK. 

On the 6 December 2017, I embarked on a significant journey, flying out from Dhaka, Bangladesh, to the UK. After a long and exhausting flight, I arrived at Manchester Airport early on the morning of December the 7th 2017. Upon my arrival, I found myself in a state where I was barely able to do anything with my right side, struggling to take even a single step from the car to the wheelchair that awaited me. I was swiftly admitted to Manchester Royal Hospital, but due to the severe involuntary spasms I was experiencing, the medical staff could do little more than administer high doses of painkillers throughout the night. The following morning, around 7 am, I was transferred to Salford Royal Hospital for further evaluation and care.

During my unsettling 24-hour stay at Manchester Royal, I felt a deep sense of humiliation that I had never experienced before. Various nurses bombarded me with questions about why I had come to the UK for treatment rather than receiving care back in Bangladesh. Instead of acknowledging my concerns, they referred to my home country as India and then Pakistan, further compounding my distress. I was in unbearable agony, the pain only worsening by the minute, while they focused on questioning my motives for seeking medical assistance in the UK, as well as my nationality and identity. 

Finally, upon my arrival at Salford Royal, the medical team proceeded with a series of tests, including MRI and X-ray scans, which they could have easily performed during my initial assessment at Manchester Royal instead of questioning my background. Once they obtained the results, they outlined their next course of action, and I was taken to an observation room in the evening, just prior to my scheduled surgery. There, further scans, including a CT scan, confirmed the dire situation: I had two broken vertebrae, and four broken pieces were compressing my spinal cord. This was the reason I was losing strength in my limbs one by one and experiencing those frightening spasms. I underwent surgery later that night, but by then, I had become paralysed from the neck down. The surgeon's words were chilling: “Your prognosis is worse than we diagnosed prior to the operation.”

 I was in the Intensive Care Unit (ICU) for nearly a week before they made the decision to transfer me to the High Dependency Care Unit (HDCU) for another few days of close monitoring. After my time in HDCU, I was moved to a side room in the general ward, where I could begin to recover in a slightly less intensive environment. While I was receiving treatment in both ICU and HDCU, the medical team discovered that a section of my lungs had collapsed, adding to the complications of my condition. I was undergoing intensive physiotherapy to regain control over my breathing, which was quite challenging. As I mentioned, I was completely paralysed from the neck down for well over two weeks following my spinal surgery, which involved my cervical spine around the C3-C4 and C5-C6 vertebrae at least, that’s what I recall. As the year was drawing to a close, I began to experience some movement returning to my toes and hands, which was incredibly encouraging. My left side started to respond first during the first week of January 2018. By the second week of the new year, I was transferred to the Acute Neurological Rehabilitation until I could secure a placement at the Northern General Hospital for specialised Spinal Injury Rehabilitation. During my last few days at Salford Royal Hospital, with the invaluable assistance from their dedicated physiotherapists and occupational therapists, I made significant progress and began to walk using a Zimmer frame, which felt like a monumental step forward in my recovery.

 I then transferred to the Royal Princess Ann’s Unit at Sheffield Northern General to begin my rehabilitation journey. They initially thought that I had received treatment at a hospital in Pakistan before I was admitted to Salford Royal. I was kept in quarantine for a week, allowing the medical team to monitor my condition closely before they commenced my rehabilitation program. Two weeks later, after consistent progress and monitoring, they made the decision to discharge me so I could return home. The Consultant informed me that individuals who undergo the type of surgeries performed on the neck typically require at least six months of recovery time before they can sit up independently. However, in my case, I was already walking (as part of my physiotherapy) within six weeks, using a Zimmer frame to assist me. As I managed to move around my room using either a wheelchair or crutches, especially during visits to and from the physiotherapy room, they decided it was safe to discharge me, albeit with the caution that I should not be left alone at home. Consequently, I stayed with my cousin in Manchester for another couple of weeks to acclimate to general living conditions, as I had spent nearly three months in the hospital by that point. Afterward, my cousin kindly drove me back to my bungalow in Lowestoft. However, once he left, I was hit with reality the very next day and found myself struggling immensely. I ended up developing PTSD and became deeply depressed and frustrated. It felt as though I couldn’t breathe, and I found myself hiding away at home. Fortunately, my counsellor from the mental hospital introduced me to a group that encouraged people to explore photography, which became a turning point for me.

I couldn't just sit around idly doing nothing, so I made the decision to take proactive steps by mending my website, which had been long overdue for some much-needed attention and care. At the same time, I began engaging in meaningful Voluntary Work as an Advisor at our local Citizens Advice Bureau, where I have found immense satisfaction and joy in helping others navigate their challenges. Additionally, I took on the important role of Vice-chair for another organisation that is devoted to supporting individuals with disabilities, known as Lowestoft Shopmobility. And of course, I must not forget to mention my YouTube Channel, which has become a significant and rewarding focus for me. I'm truly fortunate to be receiving a lot of positive support for my Channel, which has proven to be incredibly encouraging and uplifting! Therefore, I hope you can see just how vital it is for me to grow my YouTube presence. Not only is it an important personal goal, but I believe it may also help me to achieve something meaningful and rewarding for myself in the long run, particularly as I work towards recovering from depression and striving passionately for a brighter future filled with possibilities. 

Thank you so very much for taking the time to read through my long and winding story that I've shared with you. Your genuine interest means a great deal to me, and I truly appreciate every moment you spent engaging with my words!

Please don’t forget to take a moment out of your busy day to Subscribe to my website, as well as to sign up for my engaging Blog too. Your support truly means a lot to me, and it will ensure that you stay updated on all the exciting new content I’ll be sharing with you! Thank you for being a part of this journey!